OK. They're 14.

A long overdue introduction...Meet my informants!

(from left to right) Beth, Courtney, Stephen, and Phillip

Tonight I hung out with my group and they were crazy! The first 2 hours were a regular youth group meeting, with other students as well as my 4 informants. After youth group I took my 4 to the diner where they did an excellent job at embarassing me and making me regret taking them anywhere... but I got over it pretty quickly and let them just be 14.

I got to do a lot of observing them and their behavior and interactions. There was eating sugar straight from the container, water spit across the table (several times) because they crack each other up...pretty gross, but, absolutelly hysterical....they were singing, making fun of each other...typical teenage stuff. The surprise of the evening was the conflict/resoloution that took place without me having to say a word. Good stuff. And I got a lot more "teen talk" phrases that I'll put on that link.

The thing that I realized after tonight is that I can't meet with all of them at the same time if I want them to actually talk about something serious. There's nothing that can hold their attention outside of themselves for any period of time when they're all together. So I'm thinking I'll try 2 at a time...I'm not sure, I have to think about that because I do think the group interaction is good. It's just not very productive.

Teenage Overload

Well, I've spent pretty much this entire weekend with my teenagers. Last night we sat for hours at Starbucks, where they let me into their social world. I was filled in on all the high school drama, the boys/girls they like... which was actually really interesting because one of my boys is gay, so him and the girls are all crushing on the same guys. Then we talked about just some of the stuff they go through. Anxieties they have, what popularity and clothing means to them, family relationships....a ton of stuff. It was kind of overwhelming, and they told me they aren't done talking, so I guess these random coffee trips are going to become a fairly regular thing...although I think I'm not going to take all five at the same time again. That was just crazy.

Today one of the girls had her 15th birthday party. 20 teenagers.... and me. Although, they actually really like having me around, so it wasn't as awkward as it could have been. I had fun watching them interact with each other. All of them had their phones out the entire time, texting constantly...sometimes to a person that was sitting just across the room. Music was on, singing and dancing was happening, making fun of each other had them laughing...

Overall, not a bad weekend in terms of this class....but I'd be totally okay with not seeing another teenager for a couple days.

update

My consent forms are in for 3 of the kids, I'm waiting for one more. The MySpace site is taking off, nicely as my informants are making the page theirs. The background is a collage of pictures of youth group events, the quote changes daily, and they're one by one posting blogs about who they are on the site. I'm planning on getting together with them sometime this weekend.

The only problem I'm having so far is one of the kids being grounded and not being allowed near the computer until her grades come up...I'm pretty sure I can find a way around that though... we'll see.

Learning the Real Issues

This past weekend I was at "Mid-Winter Advance," a Christian retreat that I took my youth group kids on. For 3 days I spent time watching, listening to, and interacting with teenagers 6th grade and up. (not all of them were Christians)

The weekends theme was "Calm the Storm." A "storm" was defined as something that comes into your life unexpectedly that you have to deal with. We talked about why we have storms in our lives, what purposes they serve, and how there is (emotional) peace within the storm because of God's presence. The weekend was led by a team of students from Lancaster Bible College. They mostly led the morning and evening services, leading the teens in worship songs, speaking to them about Biblical storms and storms that come in life in general, and they also also shared their own personal stories with the teens about things they struggled with in high school.

Because the team was so open about their lives not being perfect, the teens saw and felt that it was okay for them to also just be who they are.

They got to choose 2 seminars to go to out of 8 different topics, from learning a song in sign languge to talking about the real issues in life.

I sat in on 2 sessions of the only seminar that was being led "discussion style" about storms, where I listened to the teens talk about their famillies, peer pressure, drugs, sex and relationships (among other things).

They had almost 5 hours of free time in the afternoon, when they could play volleyball, basketball, swim, take a nap, or walk around the lake... They all made a lot of new friends. They talked about how easy it was to make friends at camp. That they could just walk up to anyone and start a conversation and they were accepted. In the real world, though, things don't work like that and pretty much all of them are afraid that they will never be accepted at school. They didn't want to leave this place where everyone is accepted to go back to their schools where most of them feel so alone.

On Saturday night there was what they call "family time" where each youth group gathers together and talks about what has happened so far in the weekend and to kind of check in with each other. My youth group was combined with another group that we're connected to, giving us leaders a total of 25 students. We asked them to share openly with each other, and the things that came out of their mouths were so raw and honest...I was kind of surprised because usually none of them listen to each other, but for some reason that night they did. As they shared their struggles, they got feedback from the others in the group who are going through the same thing. They all have a lot of similar issues, and none of them knew or realized it until that night.

There were 3 different boys who thought they were the only one in the group who was being forced to go to therapy in school for anger issues.

The popular boy and the "nerdy" girl were in the same boat, both having older siblings who are planning on leaving home shortly because they can't stand the tension and drama that occours within it's walls. Both were afraid to go home. Nearly half the group has serious family issues, most are dealing with absent parents or siblings running around making terrible choices.

Another thing that pretty much all of them said is that high school in general is a storm because of popularity issues and the other stuff I've already mentioned

In the end, they all saw that none of them are alone in how they feel and what they're dealing with. They all --from the popular jock to the band geek-- have common ground and can be friends despite their varying social statuses in school.

And I had an up-close and personal look into the lives of 25 teenagers...and I actually had a good time doing it.

Taking Teens on a Retreat This Weekend!

I've gotten lots of consent forms in and one parent actually was excited about this project. (I have had a long relationship with that family, so they trust me, and their daughter looks to me as an older sister)

My MySpace page is taking off and I am amazed at how open the kids are being. I started them out. Wrote a blog about who I am...the side they don't see as I'm teaching them Bible lessons. They responded really well to that and have followed my lead in writing their own blogs on our MySpace page.

I'm taking a couple of the youth group girls on a retreat where there will be about 300+ teenagers. I'm sure that this weekend is going to leave me completelly wiped out, but I'm really excited about it. I think I'll be able to get some pretty good observing time as they interact with other teens that they, for the most part, won't know.

Getting Started

I am a little delayed in getting this blog up, but so far, I think I'm doing okay with this project. I am lucky enough to know a great group of teenagers who are excited about me using them for this research. I am a Youth Leader/Director at a church near where I live and plan on using the regulars in the group. I have sent them all the consent forms for them and their parents and with any luck, they'll actually remember to bring them back to me tomorrow.